2 January 2003
I made the assumption that Thanksgiving would
be a sneak peek at what the winter break would have in store for
me. Unfortunately, I was mistaken. Maybe my previous visit home
had left me with some pretty high hopes for what winter would bring,
or maybe the said break‚ was long enough for some pretty harsh
realities to surface.
The first week I found myself relieved and
happy that my first semester had come to a close. Bumping into acquaintances,
and comparing notes about experiences with old friends brought forth
a comfortable and warm atmosphere in which to celebrate the holidays.
However, soon that high wore off. It became difficult for me to
adjust to life back home. It wasn’t that the rules were strict,
or that I didn’t have enough privacy. It was more like I was
resentful of the fact that after adjusting to my life as a college
student, I was now supposed to, in the blink of an eye, shut that
part of me off.
I talked to a friend about this whole new
concept of adjusting every time a holiday rolled around. I expected
some comforting words, like, “Oh, it gets so much easier,
Nicole.” But I got “I heard it only gets stranger and
more bizarre.” I began to think that maybe coming home wasn’t
for everyone, that I had done all the growing I needed to do at
home and that a month was just too much. I talked to some friends
about that as well, and we all came to the same conclusion. We wanted
to go back to school. Well, maybe not classes so much, but just
to our respective “homes away from home.” We all sat
back and wowed at one another, and when we were done doing that,
we compared notes on what we missed and why we missed it. New friends,
new places, new things to do, we missed it all.
The second week of break was over and now
all that was left was—well, two more weeks. I was going around
feeling pretty bored, and also acting very smug about how well I
had adjusted to my new life, and how much I had “grown out”
of where I used to live. Yet, all that arrogance was shoved right
in my face not too long after it began to surface. Certain events
made me see that I still needed some guidance and some sort of structure.
You see, I came to the conclusion that maybe
break serves multiple purposes. Winter break gives you time to
- Cool your brain before you burn it out again.
- See family and friends who are a big part of your life.
- Pat yourself on the back for surviving your first semester.
- Come up with reasons why you love where you go to school, so
that you can pull out the list later when you get homesick after
eating bad dorm food.
- Realize that no matter how much you think you’ve grown,
you have much more growing to do.
However, wouldn’t three weeks be more
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