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Lonely.

I’ve discovered very quickly that when people leave the UT campus, as excited as I might immediately be to have peace and quiet, it gets super lonely very quickly.
I attended South by Southwest last year, so I figured I was an old hand at the “everyone leaves campus but you” scenario. However, because I recently hurt a good friend badly enough to make her never want to speak with me again, I feel more lonely than ever. Thus, I wanted to share with you what I’ve learned from this experience.
1. People make mistakes. Nobody is perfect, so learn to forgive yourself. It’s something that has taken me the longest time to learn how to do, but I’m getting better at it, and the healing process is so much quicker this way.
2. Make friends during your time in college. The more you have, the harder it will be to be super close with any one, but that’s OK, too. Figure out what you are looking for in friendships, and go with it.
3. Get involved! Today was an extremely happy day, because I went to volunteer for Dress for Success with my good friend Loren Seeger. She’s the manager at the student radio station, KVRX, and my total mentor. I love her! Then, we went down to the Austin Convention Center in the POURING rain and picked up our SxSW stuff. It was super exciting, and a great change for me from just kinda reading in my room, doing laundry and stuff.
4. Be honest with people. I have an extremely difficult time with this, especially because I have low confidence, an eating disorder, and have been passive-aggressive most of my life. I’m working on it, though, and some of my best friends are the supportive ones who have stuck with me, despite the intense hardships they’ve had to deal with because of it. My boyfriend Scott is especially my lifesaver; he helps me through SO much.
That was a lot of personal stuff to throw on you all at once! I think all of this alone time has caused serious self-reflection. The moral of my story is, it’s OK to stay behind on the UT campus for Spring Break. Just make sure to get involved with stuff outside of your dorm room, and keep in touch with pals, because it will feel much less lonely:) Tonight, I get to interview my friend, singer-songwriter Jason Soudah, on my radio show; wish me luck!

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March 13, 2007 | | Comments are closed for this post
photo of Caitlin