Unnecessary fancy writing

I overheard this conversation:

"Given the popularity of this event, might we provide for enhanced capacity?"

"I don't know about that, but we do need you to set up more chairs."

Why do we talk this way? And why do we write this way?

Original: "In reviewing potential infringement of the right to alienate property, the controlling question is whether a contested action amounts to direct and total deprivation of the above protected property interest. A direct and total deprivation of the right to alienate is a decisive step above the simple impingement of said right."

Revised: "To decide if the government has infringed on the right to sell a car, we have to answer this question first: Was the seller denied the right to sell? Or was the right to sell simply limited in some way? Being denied the right to sell is worse than having the right to sell limited in some way."

So show off your big vocabulary in your diary; in public, write so we can understand you quickly and easily.