Plain English: I grade Arizona

Sometimes a jury gets stuck and reports to the judge that it cannot reach a verdict. Often the judge reads the jurors a stiff and stilted charge (Allen charge) that tells them to go back and try again. Here is a better approach from the new and improved Arizona jury instructions:

This instruction is offered to help your deliberations, not to force you to reach a verdict.

You may wish to identify areas of agreement and areas of disagreement. You may then wish to discuss the law and the evidence as they relate to areas of disagreement.

If you still have disagreement, you may wish to identify for the court and counsel which issues or questions of law or fact you would like counsel or the court to assist you with. If you elect this option, please list in writing the issues where further assistance might help bring about a verdict.

I do not wish or intend to force a verdict. We are merely trying to be responsive to your apparent need for help. If it is reasonably probable that you could reach a verdict as a result of this procedure, it would be wise to give it a try.

Very good, don't you think? Flesch score is 68 and grade level is 8. I give it an A-.

But just so you can see what a zealot for plain English would do, I offer my rewrite:

What I’m about to say is meant to help you decide the case, not to force you to reach a verdict.

It might help to list the things you agree on and the things you don’t. Then discuss the law and the evidence as they relate to the things you do not agree on. If it is reasonably probable that you could reach a verdict by doing this, it would be wise to give it a try.

If you still disagree, you can tell me the issues or questions of law or fact you would like the lawyers or me to help you with. If you do this, please write down the issues we could help you with.

Again, I do not wish or intend to force a verdict. I only want to respond to your request for help.

The Flesch score is now a ridiculous 88 and the grade level is 6. Did I go too far?